Stardate: 96201.5
Captain's Log
My ship, badly damaged, is floating here in a space where man no longer voyages. I'm alone. My crew brutally bored to death by my space shanties, has selfishly left me to fend for myself. All I have to comfort me is Highland Folk Music and the every repetitious movie.... Good Burger.
I'm so hungry. It's been nearly 11 minutes since I've last eaten. Food may, at this rate, last me about 2 years. I have to get out of here. But I digress.
My name is Mr. Doctor Professor Alan, captain of this rusty tin can. If you look at the stereotypical space crew, I was the handsome one. I must repair and understand these computers. Through these ancient DvDs of Computer Sciences Portal I shall learn how to save my hide and bring my crew back to home. I shall do it with a pip in my step and a song in my heart..........
"AND I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU-U-U-U!"
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